


breathe

by princedoyeom



Category: 1The9 (Band), 언더 나인틴 | Under Nineteen (TV)
Genre: Brotherly Love, Fluff and Angst, Jung Jinsung-centric, M/M, Multi, Platonic Cuddling, how do tags work even, i love my 2002 liners, jinsung needs a hug, jinsung/doyum, just a smidge, just really soft, okay maybe a bit angst, platonic, pure fluff, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-08 10:35:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17979704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princedoyeom/pseuds/princedoyeom
Summary: where in jinsung always seemed to be there for his members whenever they needed a hug, but when he needed one, there was no one there for him.except, jeon doyum.





	breathe

**Author's Note:**

> wrote this at like 3 am bc the prompt wouldn't let me sleep im sorry,,, just a self indulgent story written for my 2002 liners, i love them so much

jung jinsung is what you call a clingy person.

okay, scratch that.

jung jinsung is what you call _**an extremely**_ clingy person.

affectionate by nature, jinsung tended to gravitate towards his members like butterflies to flowers during pollen season.

and as affectionate as he is, jinsung is also a _**very**_ sensitive person.

he knows when yongha is feeling a bit too pressured from being their leader, or when junseo’s feeling a tad bit insecure about his abilities. he knows when sungwon is sad because his ever present smile is missing from his face, and he knows when seunghwan’s feeling extra tired from the never ending practice they endure everyday.

whenever jinsung feels like his members need a hug, or an energy boost, or simply a pat on the back, jinsung will bound over to cheer them up like a conditioned dog. jinsung is always there to oblige, words of comfort and encouragement spilling from his lips and his arms always open to give the warmest hugs.

this particular sunday though, jinsung woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

not literally, but well, you know what i mean.

he didn’t want to leave his bed, he didn’t want to face the day, and he didn’t really want to see anyone for the time being.

nothing particularly bad happened, it was just one of those days where in he’s got too much on his mind and the thoughts are suffocating him so much he can hardly breathe.

_is he doing this right? is he even good enough to stand on the stage? does he even have a chance? what if the fans stop liking him after seeing him when they debut? what if they realize that jinsung’s the least talented member here? where would that leave him next?_

a knock on the door interrupts his thoughts of self-pity.

_no, go away._

the person knocks again and jinsung lets out a small “come in.”

the door opens and yechan’s head peers into view, slightly wary eyes meeting jinsung’s.

“oh good you’re up. what are you still doing in bed? breakfast is ready, are you okay?”

_no, oh god leave me alone._

“yeah hyung, i’m okay. i’m not really hungry so i’m probably going to skip breakfast today.”

yechan stares at him for a moment before nodding.

“well, alright. today’s our day off so you’re free to do whatever you want. the others and i are going to the studio for a bit to rehearse though, would you like to come?”

_get a hint already and go away._

“no hyung, i’m good thanks.” jinsung answers with a small shake of his head.

yechan nods again before his head disappears and the door closes with a firm ‘click.’

jinsung sinks into his bed, blank eyes staring up into the ceiling. the thoughts are back, and jinsung curls over to the side, his arms reaching for the sheets. he pulls it over his head, and he hides himself, wishing that his blanket could not only hide him from the world, but also hide his thoughts from his own mind as well.

his wallowing was disrupted once again by another knock on the door. jinsung had no intention to ask who was knocking, nor did he untangle himself from his messy sheets to open the door. he didn’t tell the person to come in, jinsung simply laid in his bundled up sheets, like a caterpillar in its cocoon, not caring when another knock sounded.

jinsung heard the door open then close and he stayed still, praying that whoever it is, he’ll think that jinsung’s asleep and leave.

he prayed, god rarely answers.

jinsung hears soft footsteps and he tenses, mentally cursing himself because the sheets ruffle a bit as he moves. he feels the bed dip as the person who came in the room takes a seat next to his head.

“jinsung-ah.”

a hand softly makes its way to his blanket covered head, and jinsung exhales out a shaky breath that he didn’t even notice he  _was_  holding in. it was as if the hand that touched him had released all of his inner worries. jinsung slightly lifts his head, just enough for it to get out of the blanket cocoon that he made.

“doyum, what are you doing here? yechan-hyung told me you guys were going to the studio today to practice?”

doyum’s hand came to rest on jinsung’s head before he started to lightly comb his fingers through the other’s tuft of fluffy hair.

“they went, i didn’t. seunghwan-hyung, sungwonnie and taekhyeonnie didn’t go either. yechan-hyung told me you were skipping breakfast, are you okay?”

jinsung mumbles a half-hearted “...yeah, i’m okay.”

doyum snorts before he ruffles jinsung’s hair roughly.

“maybe yechan-hyung bought your lie but i don’t. come on ‘sung, i’ve known you the longest here. this is not like you, what’s going on?”

doyum sits on the bed now fully, his legs crossing in the middle and jinsung scoots over to the side to make room. as soon as doyum’s settled into a comfortable sitting position, jinsung moves closer to him, his head high enough to rest on doyum’s crossed legs.

“come on, ‘sung. what’s wrong?”

jinsung takes a shuddering breath, eyes closed and body still curled up as doyum continues his ministrations on jinsung’s hair. he pets his clearly distressed friend’s head in a manner that he hoped to be soothing.

“…everything.”

it takes jinsung a moment to answer, but when he does, he feels doyum’s hand turn still before continuing.

“everything?” doyum asks.

jinsung nods. “everything.”

doyum stays silent for a while and jinsung’s eyes open as he looks at his quiet friend, afraid of the reaction doyum might have had to his answer. when doyum’s eyes meet his, jinsung offers a small smile before it turns into a small frown, his plump lips pouting. doyum frowns at him too and jinsung, seeing this, sighs before signalling the other with his head.

doyum nods before he slowly and carefully moves to lay down beside jinsung. the other takes the covers off of himself and he scoots over to the side again to accommodate another person on his bed. he throws the sheets over on both of them when doyum has situated himself beside jinsung, arms open in an obvious invitation. as jinsung sinks into his embrace, doyum wraps his arms around him and wriggles up a bit, just enough so that he can tuck in jinsung’s head under his chin.

jinsung’s arms wrap tentatively around doyum as he takes in a deep breath. doyum simply stays quiet as his hand continues on caressing jinsung’s head. he feels jinsung take a few more deep breaths before letting out another shuddering gasp. once he felt jinsung’s arms tighten around him, and the other’s head finally laying limp on his chest, doyum simply says,

“tell me all about it.”

and so jinsung does. he whispers every insecurity he has onto doyum’s chest, every what ifs and every single, ugly thought he’s had that’s making it hard for him to breathe. he talks slowly and without volume, afraid that if he speaks louder, the whole world would know his secrets. he talks as if no one was listening, and he hugs doyum’s tightly, as if the other was nothing more than a very warm pillow.

doyum doesn’t mind, he really doesn’t. the whole time, he just listens but his heart aches. he wanted nothing more than to contradict jinsung’s thoughts because he  _ **is**_ so talented, he  _ **is**_ good enough, and doyum feels like he's the one who's really lucky he gets to debut alongside him.

jinsung stops rambling and doyum just hugs him tighter. his shirt was wet from jinsung’s tears, the other breaking down as soon as he started talking, but he doesn’t mind.

it’s jinsung, so it’s okay.

for a while, the only sound heard in the room was jinsung’s sniffles and the light humming of the ac.

“jinsung, look at me.” doyum finally says.

jinsung doesn’t, he shakes his head and he shields his eyes from doyum’s view, opting to bury his face further into the crook of doyum’s neck.

“jinsung i can’t tell you to stop thinking like that, because they’re your thoughts and i have no control over them. But i am telling you what i think, so please listen to me carefully okay.”

jinsung stays silent and only lets out a small nod, doyum takes it as permission to continue.

“you’re one of the most talented people i know.” doyum starts. he feels jinsung tighten his arms around him, and he lightly combs his fingers through the other’s hair.

“you always make sure that everyone’s okay, you make others laugh even if you’ll look stupid. you always look out for us... but honestly, i worry about you from time to time because jinsung, you always worry about the others but you never worry for you.”

doyum pauses before he tightens his arms around jinsung too. he starts to caress jinsung's head.

“did you know that i’ve always admired your confidence? both on stage and off, you just have this ‘i can do anything’ aura and it’s really captivating. you’re really great at what you do, and the fans wouldn’t vote for you if they didn’t think so too so please don’t doubt yourself any more than you already have.”

they were silent for a few moments before jinsung takes in a deep breath again, letting it out softly in small puffs on doyum’s skin.

“…..thank you ‘yum.”

doyum smiles.

“it’s no problem ‘sung.”

**Author's Note:**

> if you're reading this then thank u, leave me a comment or a critique i appreciate everything


End file.
